The Block recap: Much ado about nothing (12.10.2016)

Adam Smith 13 October 2016

The block 2016 episode 31 title card

Kitchen week has our contestants seeing red, and us seeing little of consequence.

Who’s been sleeping in Kim and Chris’ bed? Why it’s Ben, our loveable lad from Geelong. In a move as creepy as it was, well, super-creepy, Ben decided to give the couple’s master bedroom a test drive (alone, thankfully) without their knowledge. This left Kim to ponder who could have possibly been anti-social enough to invade the couple’s bedroom.

Ben sleeps in Kim's bed

Ben leaving the scene of the crime. Source: Channel 9.

It was Wednesday night on The Block, so this was the kind of drama we were treated to. They have to fill the time somehow, because unlike Will and Karlie’s feature wall, those Suzukis aren’t gonna sell themselves.

Creepiness aside, the contestants were deep in the middle of kitchen hell week. It was time to get their benches and fixtures installed, and everyone seemed to have buyer’s remorse. First, Dan tried to get the poor installers from Freedom to throw off their entire day’s schedule to give him time to fix a tiling issue. Rather than work toward a solution, he decided to have a go at the Freedom folks. It serves as brilliant product placement: “Freedom: If You’re Over 50, Verbally Abuse Our Workers for Free!”

Dan's game face

Dan gets his game face on. Source: Channel 9.

Kim got into the action as well, and was unhappy with her kitchen island. She opted for the passive aggressive route, though, rather than emulating Dan’s active aggression.

Kim gets mad at Freedom

Kim argues with Freedom part one. Source: Channel 9.

Kim gets mad at Freedom 2

Kim argues with Freedom part two. Source: Channel 9.

Meanwhile, budget woes continued for the contestants. Andy and Ben informed their builder that he probably wouldn’t be getting paid unless the boys won some challenges. Hopefully he works out of altruism. Karlie and Will are similarly skint, with the added problem of a money-sponge courtyard they can’t afford to finish. Host Scott Cam reassured the teams there were always opportunities to win some extra dosh, then he sprouted horns and a tail and promised them funds in exchange for selling their immortal souls to McCafe.

4099538330_c8404b0d86

Pictured: Scott Cam

To finish off the episode, Nine decided to tug at the heartstrings with a tearful bit about how much Kim and Chris miss their kids. Don’t the producers know that when they humanise the contestants it makes it harder for us to make fun of them in our recaps?

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