The Block Auction Day LIVE Recap! (13.11.16)
From the bad fashion choices to the final sale prices, here's what went down on The Block finale for 2016.
THE WINNERS - Karlie and Will - $2.6m, $715,000 profit - read recap
Julia and Sasha - $2.59m, $660,000 profit - read recap
Dan and Carleen - $2.3m, $525,000 profit - read recap
Kim and Chris - $2.305m, $425,000 profit - read recap
Andy and Ben - $2.25m, $510,000 profit - read recap
Throughout the 2016 season of The Block, we've been recapping every episode. So for the finale, we're going one better, and we'll be live blogging all the action as the episode airs.
Bookmark this page and join the team (Adam, Marc and Angus) at 7:00pm AEDT on Sunday 13 November for all The Block madness. Will anyone want to buy a property built by Dan and Carleen? Will Julia and Sasha finally break up? Will someone call Shaynna a bogan yet again? Will the Ben and Andy shippers get their wish? Can we have another McCafe? So many questions! So much snark!
The Block 2016 Grand Finale Live Blog
Adam Smith [6:53 PM] We're moments away from The Block finale. Who will win? Who will walk away crying? HOW WILL THEY FILL TWO HOURS?
Angus Kidman [6:54 PM] By making us hate the boomers even more?
Adam Smith [6:54 PM] That won't take anywhere near two hours.
Angus Kidman [6:55 PM] You underestimate how far that could go . I'm also wondering if this episode will serve as proof that the Melbourne market has officially peaked
Adam Smith [6:56 PM] Not a great time to be selling apartments there, is it? They're not exactly in short supply.
Angus Kidman [6:57 PM] But they don't have the Julia/Sash touch. Probably a good thing.
Adam Smith [6:58 PM] Do we know if there's any investment benefit to buying a Block apartment? Like, will its fleeting moment of TV fame translate to better returns?
And we start with Bonnie Tyler?
Angus Kidman [7:01 PM] Channel Nine needs Married at First Sight for first half 2017 ratings. The Block will take care of the second half. And here we do the history reminder for everyone who hasn't watched prior episodes. Chances are this will get 2 million viewers, which means half will have never seen it before.
Adam Smith [7:02 PM] Scott Cam, "The biggest Block we've ever taken on". Isn't that every season? One season I'd love them to be like, "we decided to scale down and do something easy this year".
Angus Kidman [7:02 PM] The Block: Portsea Beach Shacks edition.
Adam Smith [7:03 PM] Maybe they just put up tents.
Angus Kidman [7:03 PM] Ten weeks just redoing the powder rooms.
Marc Terrano [7:03 PM] Hey guys! SO excited to be watching this with you two.
Adam Smith [7:03 PM] And Mr. Terrano arrives in his Suzuki Vitara, McCafe in hand!
Angus Kidman [7:03 PM] I fear that excitement will be tempered during the evening.
"Everyone's getting a bit catty". People, we'll show you how catty is done.
Marc Terrano [7:04 PM] Hahaha, I'm watching the episode from my 'home of the present'.
Angus Kidman [7:04 PM] These credits don't get any better 45 episodes in, do they?
Adam Smith [7:04 PM] Trusting every aspect of our lives to a giant computer is the best decision we ever made!
Angus Kidman [7:04 PM] THE ALL-IMPORTANT AUCTION ORDER!
Nope, more black and white footage
Adam Smith [7:04 PM] Look at that boardroom table. Is Mark Bouris gonna come in and fire one of them?
Angus Kidman [7:05 PM] No, it's for ritual swingers.
Adam Smith [7:05 PM] We get it. It was a soap factory.
Angus Kidman [7:05 PM] Justin Bieber! So not necessary! Aren't we suffering enough?
Adam Smith [7:05 PM] This is gonna blow those old-timey guys' minds
Marc Terrano [7:06 PM] Oh wow, they're really riding this whole 1920s theme
Angus Kidman [7:06 PM] They have minds? I thought they were VR avatars. And by "riding" you mean "executing poorly".
Adam Smith [7:06 PM] And THIS is how they stretch it to two hours.
Angus Kidman [7:06 PM] This and Suzuki ads.
Ah, Gary Numan. If we must stretch, better musical choice.
Adam Smith [7:06 PM] I'm glad they showed this. Otherwise we wouldn't know how those envelopes got there. We would've been totally lost.
Angus Kidman [7:07 PM] Yeah, envelope delivery can be super-confusing.
Marc Terrano [7:07 PM] Product placement #1 Prosegur.
Angus Kidman [7:07 PM] Product placement #2 Darleen needs help.
Adam Smith [7:07 PM] The contestants would've been opening envelopes with their reserve prices and we'd be all like, "Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down there, turbo! Where'd those envelopes come from?"
Marc Terrano [7:07 PM] Haha.
Angus Kidman [7:07 PM] Caps on the boys so we know they're down with the yoof.
Scott, that's not how you dress for a boardroom
Adam Smith [7:08 PM] You're fired.
Angus Kidman [7:08 PM] OK, let's note these numbers.
Marc Terrano [7:08 PM] Scott is trying his hardest to stall for time.
Adam Smith [7:08 PM] $1,950,000 for J&S.
That's A LOT, though IMHO they have the nicest apartment.
Angus Kidman [7:09 PM] They are so screwed. The difference won't pay for their relationship counselling.
Adam Smith [7:09 PM] $1.9 for Chris and Kim, and for Will and Karlie.
Angus Kidman [7:09 PM] $1.8 million for the boomers. Dammit! And $1.75m for the boys.
Adam Smith [7:09 PM] Because their place sucks. Sorry boys.
Angus Kidman [7:10 PM] Lower reserve = better chance of making a big difference.
Adam Smith [7:10 PM] Has to sell first, of course.
Angus Kidman [7:10 PM] Telstra plug!
Marc Terrano [7:11 PM] Product placement #3: Telstra
Angus Kidman [7:11 PM] But the reserve reductions won't make such a difference.
Adam Smith [7:11 PM] Ok so 1.7 for J&S.
Angus Kidman [7:11 PM] We have to repeat these numbers because maths is a not a strong suit for Nine viewers.[7:12] Hey Darleen, just spotted the Police T-shirt. Good way to remind everyone of your age I guess.
Marc Terrano [7:12 PM] Ouch. The boys are really tapping into US election sentiment
Adam Smith [7:12 PM] So they're blaming Trump pre-emptively for their bad performance.
Marc Terrano [7:12 PM] Good for them.
Adam Smith [7:12 PM] Fair enough.
Angus Kidman [7:13 PM] Hell, why not?
Marc Terrano [7:13 PM] The claws are really coming out!
Angus Kidman [7:13 PM] Meanwhile, I've just remembered that Carleen is called Carleen, not Darleen. My hatred runs so deep I don't want to give the respect of actual names.
Adam Smith [7:13 PM] Darleen and Can.
Marc Terrano [7:13 PM] The thin veneer of tolerance between the boys and Julia and Sasha has dissolved.
Angus Kidman [7:14 PM] That veneer dissolved years ago.
Marc Terrano [7:14 PM] Haha.
Angus Kidman [7:14 PM] "IN TOUCH" is the new Block catchphrase.
Adam Smith [7:14 PM] It seems they're mostly arguing about who cut who off.
Angus Kidman [7:14 PM] Don't argue with Scott, girls. No winning there.
Marc Terrano [7:14 PM] Wait, why are we arguing over the number of bidders, does it really matter?
Adam Smith [7:14 PM] Ad break. Sweet relief.
Angus Kidman [7:14 PM] And ad break one! Clearly we're getting a lot of Bonnie Tyler tonight. TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE BLOCK.
Adam Smith [7:15 PM] We'll need all the Bonnie Tyler we can get.
Angus Kidman [7:16 PM] Agree 100%.
Those reserve prices will, on reflection, make spotting a winner hard. Which I guess is the whole point.
Adam Smith [7:17 PM] Do we have some predictions, guys?
Angus Kidman [7:18 PM] Emotionally, I want Will & Carlie. Results-wise, I suspect the girls have the edge.
Adam Smith [7:18 PM] Yeah I reckon the girls as well.
Angus Kidman [7:18 PM] And we're back after a kind thanks to all our sponsors.
Adam Smith [7:19 PM] Which apartment would you most like to stay in?
Marc Terrano [7:19 PM] I'm putting my money on Will and Karlie.
Angus Kidman [7:19 PM] I'd like to stay on the rooftop garden.
Meanwhile, Scott goes into a frenzy of pointing. SET THE BAR HIGH!
Adam Smith [7:19 PM] What in the world is that statue behind him? it's incredibly distracting! Is that Julie Newmar as Catwoman????
Angus Kidman [7:20 PM] The Velvet Soap girl?
Adam Smith [7:20 PM] That makes more sense.
Marc Terrano [7:20 PM] "If you start well, everything goes well." Thank you Carleen for that wisdom.
Angus Kidman [7:20 PM] So the girls are going spot #2.
Adam Smith [7:20 PM] Will and Karlie #1.
Adam Smith [7:21 PM] Now they're all sharing their reserves. Did Andy and Ben lose theirs?
Marc Terrano [7:21 PM] Haha that's what I thought. Apparently it's 'tactical'. The boys are really losing their whole 'aloof prankster' veneer.
Angus Kidman [7:22 PM] "We don't have to show". Clearly the boys don't know how Tinder works.
Adam Smith [7:22 PM] Bazing!
Marc Terrano [7:22 PM] Dan is dropping some bombs on their characters!
Adam Smith [7:22 PM] wowzers
Marc Terrano [7:22 PM] "I would not like to get to know you Dan."
Angus Kidman [7:22 PM] Truest sentence of the show so far!
Adam Smith [7:22 PM] We thought they hated each other before!
Angus Kidman [7:22 PM] There's gonna be an Underbelly spin-off from the show at this rate.
Marc Terrano [7:23 PM] Product placement #4 Hocking Stuart.
Angus Kidman [7:23 PM] 20 minutes in and we've hit auction day. Man, there's gonna be filler here.
Adam Smith [7:23 PM] We've got another hour and 40 minutes of this, 57 minutes of which will be a "getting ready" montage
Marc Terrano [7:23 PM] I'm usually fond of montages.
Angus Kidman [7:24 PM] Let's judge their fashion choices.
Marc Terrano [7:24 PM] Product placement #5 Domain.
Adam Smith [7:24 PM] That feature wall, tho.[7:24] Will & Karlie, well done.
Marc Terrano [7:24 PM] I want some of that feng shui spray for the office.
Angus Kidman [7:25 PM] I want some fly spray for the contestants.
Marc Terrano [7:25 PM] Matching ties for the boys?
Angus Kidman [7:25 PM] Sorry boys, the ties are a fail. While Scott still refuses to wear one.
Adam Smith [7:25 PM] Wait, what was this building before? they haven't mentioned it.
Marc Terrano [7:26 PM] It's funny that the building actually looks like a block.
Adam Smith [7:26 PM] It's the most cube-like Block yet.
Angus Kidman [7:26 PM] Nominative determinism reaches The Block.
Marc Terrano [7:26 PM] Wow what car is that?
Adam Smith [7:26 PM] SUZUKI VITARA!
Marc Terrano [7:27 PM] Product placement #6 Suzuki.
Angus Kidman [7:27 PM] I was hoping for a shock BMW.
Adam Smith [7:27 PM] A knife to Suzuki's back.
Angus Kidman [7:27 PM] Also, Shelley, no. Big Bird's role is not available. Ditch the yellow dress.
Marc Terrano [7:27 PM] Product placement #7 Stayz.
Adam Smith [7:27 PM] Ah geez, i have the same shirt Scott Cam is wearing. That one's falling out of rotation from now on.
Angus Kidman [7:27 PM] Of course we were naive not to realise that the two hours would be bonus rounds of product placement.
Marc Terrano [7:28 PM] This filler is going to be chock full of product.
Angus Kidman [7:28 PM] And bad taste audience outfits.
Adam Smith [7:28 PM] Will & Karlie. Here we go.
Angus Kidman [7:28 PM] First time that foyer has ever been clean. When I visited it was a dustbowl.
Marc Terrano [7:28 PM] The auction couch aka the regular couch?
Adam Smith [7:28 PM] Odds that we get an ENTIRE RETROSPECTIVE of their Block journey?
Angus Kidman [7:29 PM] About as high as the odds of the girls breaking up.[7:29] I guess this 60 Minutes story is a future Safe as Houses.
Adam Smith [7:30 PM] In 50 years or so, given the way I've been going with them.
Angus Kidman [7:30 PM] Also by then we'll have some property history.
Marc Terrano [7:31 PM] You know, with Trump winning the election, we're obviously in a bizarro world. I think therefore Dan and Carleen will win.
Adam Smith [7:32 PM] It'll be because they carry the rust belt states.
Marc Terrano [7:32 PM] Haha.
Adam Smith [7:32 PM] AND WE'RE BACK
Angus Kidman [7:33 PM] So many distracting fashion choices amongst the bidders.
Marc Terrano [7:33 PM] I love this apartment.
Adam Smith [7:33 PM] Dave Hughes!
Angus Kidman [7:33 PM] Yeah, Dave Hughes!
Adam Smith [7:33 PM] Maybe he'll buy it!
Angus Kidman [7:33 PM] Will's gone no tie. Also a brave choice with that buttoning arrangement.
Adam Smith [7:34 PM] Scott Cam thinks Will & Karlie made the right decision going first. We shall see. Don't cry yet, Karlie!
Marc Terrano [7:34 PM] Scott Cam is nervous over other things (ratings!).
Angus Kidman [7:34 PM] Reality doesn't work like that. Sob early and sob often.
Marc Terrano [7:34 PM] And the auction begins!
Angus Kidman [7:34 PM] Ratings-wise, they need 1.8 million. But whatever, the show's back next year.
Adam Smith [7:35 PM] $1.9m already!
Marc Terrano [7:35 PM] Karlie and Will with $100,000+ of profit already.[7:35] $2.1 mill !
Adam Smith [7:35 PM] It's going nuts!
Angus Kidman [7:35 PM] $2.15m seems to be firming.
Marc Terrano [7:35 PM] $300K of profit!
Adam Smith [7:35 PM] Whoa! I thought it'd do well but this is amazing.
Angus Kidman [7:35 PM] Ah no, $2.2m.
Marc Terrano [7:35 PM] Is that Frank?
Angus Kidman [7:36 PM] It is Frank!
Marc Terrano [7:36 PM] $515K profit. These guys are set!
Marc Terrano [7:36 PM] Frank dropping those last minute bids! Wow what a result!
Angus Kidman [7:37 PM] We've hit $2.6m!
Marc Terrano [7:37 PM] Karlie and Will with $715k of profit.
Angus Kidman [7:37 PM] Final: $2.6m, $715,000 profit
Adam Smith [7:37 PM] SOLD
Angus Kidman [7:38 PM] Wow, great result for round 1
Marc Terrano [7:38 PM] There is no way the others will beat that.
Adam Smith [7:38 PM] Wow, hard to see anyone beating that.
Angus Kidman [7:38 PM] We're reminded that it is almost worth putting up with 44 episodes of rubbish from these people for the excitement of an auction.
Marc Terrano [7:38 PM] Although the property market is insane.
Adam Smith [7:38 PM] Never would have expected that.
Marc Terrano [7:38 PM] Scott Cam: "Have you spent it yet?"
Angus Kidman [7:38 PM] EMOTIONAL BACKSTORY TIME
Adam Smith [7:39 PM] "I owe some very scary people a lot of money, Scott"
Marc Terrano [7:39 PM] Haha.
Angus Kidman [7:39 PM] I'd love this to be the winning outcome, but who knows?
Marc Terrano [7:39 PM] Cue slow mo kiss.
Adam Smith [7:39 PM] Fair's fair, their place was stunning.
Marc Terrano [7:39 PM] And some really strange dancing from Will.
Angus Kidman [7:40 PM] And lots of fake enthusiasm from the other contestants.
Adam Smith [7:40 PM] Do we think the boys' place even sells?
Angus Kidman [7:40 PM] Ooh, harsh but possible. But remember the extra bathroom! People love a good lav.
Adam Smith [7:40 PM] If ANYONE is gonna beat this it's J&S.
Angus Kidman [7:40 PM] OK, let's breath again.
Adam Smith [7:45 PM] And we're back!
Marc Terrano [7:45 PM] Julia and Sasha are up.
Angus Kidman [7:45 PM] So putting the strong teams up first.
Adam Smith [7:45 PM] I reckon they do well. Top floor and all.
Angus Kidman [7:45 PM] And insights into expensive Melbourne tastes.
Adam Smith [7:45 PM] Their place has that amazing view.
Marc Terrano [7:45 PM] Yeah I think the top floor will save them, some of their rooms were a bit questionable.[7:46] "Can I have a water?" Sasha says.
Angus Kidman [7:46 PM] Also the place looks worse with all the TV lighting gear in it.
Adam Smith [7:46 PM] Don't show the camera crew, Nine. It breaks the fourth wall and TAKES THE MAGIC AWAY!
Marc Terrano [7:46 PM] Sasha looks very nervous.
Angus Kidman [7:46 PM] Is it just me or is Scott unbuttoning his shirt more each contestant?
Adam Smith [7:46 PM] By the time Kim and Chris go he'll be barechested and oiled up.
Marc Terrano [7:46 PM] Haha yeah he is getting into party animal territory.[7:47] I just don't see these guys beating Will and Karlie.
Angus Kidman [7:47 PM] It seems tricky. But high floors do sell.
Adam Smith [7:47 PM] i think they're the only ones with a chance.
Marc Terrano [7:47 PM] That's true.[7:47] I'm a pessimist (and a big Karlie and Will fan).
Adam Smith [7:47 PM] Is Dave Hughes gonna be here for this one too?[7:48] He is![7:48] BUY SOMETHING, HUGHESY!
Angus Kidman [7:48 PM] Maybe it's a condition for his Nine contract.
Marc Terrano [7:48 PM] "The best apartment Australia has ever seen."[7:48] Big words[7:48] Some real theatrics from the auctioneer.
Adam Smith [7:48 PM] This guy is good.
Marc Terrano [7:48 PM] He is really amping up the crowd.
Angus Kidman [7:48 PM] Don't laugh at your auctioneer girls!
Marc Terrano [7:49 PM] Woah $70k of profit straight off the bat.
Angus Kidman [7:49 PM] Straight in with $2m. Cash frenzy!
Adam Smith [7:49 PM] OK over reserve already. Going up fast.
Marc Terrano [7:49 PM] $220K of profit.[7:49] Frank is in![7:49] $420K of profit !
Angus Kidman [7:49 PM] Frankly my dear, I do give a damn....
Marc Terrano [7:49 PM] Frank is like an auction Santa, or Festivus saint.
Adam Smith [7:50 PM] That auctioneer has small hands. Don't know if that's an asset or detriment for an auctioneer.
Angus Kidman [7:50 PM] $620,000 profit already. Could go either way!
Marc Terrano [7:50 PM] The auctioneer is pleading with the buyers' agents.
Angus Kidman [7:50 PM] The $20K in the safe will be mentioned.
Marc Terrano [7:50 PM] Stalling at $2.55 mill.
Angus Kidman [7:50 PM] I bet there's an ad break . . .[7:52] Stall stall stall stall stall . . .
Adam Smith [7:52 PM] Come on Hughesy, you've got the dosh!
Marc Terrano [7:52 PM] Wow this is the longest auction I've ever seen.[7:52] A last minute bid![7:52] $2.565 mil
Angus Kidman [7:52 PM] And $635,000 in profit if that sticks.[7:53] Ah now, up again![7:53] And here's the $20K in the safe. KNEW IT!
Adam Smith [7:54 PM] Yeah, waited forever to pull that out of his back pocket.
Marc Terrano [7:54 PM] This auctioneer could be a good Shakespeare performer.[7:55] Stall stall stall.
Adam Smith [7:55 PM] Man this is taking so long J&S are gonna just get tired of making money.
Angus Kidman [7:55 PM] Final: $2.59m, $660K profit for J&S!
Marc Terrano [7:56 PM] My parents are literally yelling at the screen because of the stalling.
Angus Kidman [7:56 PM] Yeah, my audience are yelling they want to kill the auctioneer.
Adam Smith [7:56 PM] I'd say it's pretty definitive then that Karlie and Will just won The Block 2016.
Angus Kidman [7:56 PM] It seems likely. And we can live with that. Any chance the boomer apartment will be condemned pre-sale?
Adam Smith [7:56 PM] Hahahaha. yeah, it's probably not up to code.[7:57] Ad break.
Marc Terrano [7:57 PM] More quality programming from 9.
Angus Kidman [7:57 PM] It seems really hard to imagine a different outcome. But remember that with their low reserve, the boys could sell for about $2.4m and sneak in. Unlikely, but not 100% impossible.
Adam Smith [7:57 PM] That is true.[7:58] They could benefit from their shoddy workmanship.
Angus Kidman [7:59 PM] They're hardly alone in that! Raised floors, poor measurements, rubbish budgets . . . these places would be unsellable if the foremen weren't in there marking defects. I swear, some of the rooms look like dalmatians during that process.
Adam Smith [8:00 PM] Although to be fair, if i tried to do this I'd die in an industrial accident the very first day.
Angus Kidman [8:00 PM] Compelling viewing though.
Adam Smith [8:01 PM] Spoiler for next season of The Block.[8:01] Adam gets crushed by a retaining wall.[8:01] We're back, and Sasha is gone.
Angus Kidman [8:01 PM] Maybe this is where they break up.
Marc Terrano [8:02 PM] Haha, money heals all Angus.
Angus Kidman [8:02 PM] And the fake love with their rivals continues.
Adam Smith [8:02 PM] dan and carleen.
Angus Kidman [8:02 PM] And now, the boomers. I'll try and bury my contempt. Let's not expect I'll be successful.
Marc Terrano [8:02 PM] Our fave couple!
Adam Smith [8:02 PM] Ready for some schadenfreude?
Marc Terrano [8:03 PM] They could be the dark horse in this.
Angus Kidman [8:03 PM] If they do win, it's both the best and the worst plot twist ever.
Marc Terrano [8:03 PM] Has a contestant ever won more than $1 mil of profit in The Block? [Nope.]
Angus Kidman [8:03 PM] Scott says they're the best-looking couple. Can we have his eyes tested?
Marc Terrano [8:03 PM] And EW!
Adam Smith [8:04 PM] I could see this starting way over reserve[8:04] and it does!
Marc Terrano [8:04 PM] Wow a straight $125K of profit.[8:04] Some fast bidding!
Angus Kidman [8:04 PM] Well, they wasted a lot with the faux suspense with the last apartment.
Marc Terrano [8:04 PM] "That's good for the super" Scott Cam.[8:04] $325K of profit and it's stalling.
Adam Smith [8:05 PM] $2.1m significantly below the other two.
Marc Terrano [8:05 PM] Is that Hughesy?
Angus Kidman [8:05 PM] $2.1m. Literally saying they're basically half a million worse than the other properties. Can't quite imagine that.
Adam Smith [8:05 PM] Have you seen that awful artwork in the dining room?[8:06] Stalled out at $2.15m.
Marc Terrano [8:06 PM] This auctioneer is definitely not amping everyone up as much as the other one was.
Adam Smith [8:06 PM] I mean this auctioneer just isn't as good.
Adam Smith [8:06 PM] Maybe his hands are too big.
Angus Kidman [8:06 PM] And the ad break con!
Angus Kidman [8:07 PM] So we have to wait to see what the outcome is
Adam Smith [8:11 PM] back into it, and still stalled
Marc Terrano [8:11 PM] Is stalling this hard even legal>
Angus Kidman [8:11 PM] You know that saying about how you can't polish a turd?
Marc Terrano [8:11 PM] Mythbusters actually disproved that Angus.
Adam Smith [8:12 PM] Jumping up a bit now.
Marc Terrano [8:12 PM] Wow talk about last minute bidding![8:12] Still struggling to crack the $500k profit mark though.[8:13] The way this auction is going it's going to take another 3 hours.
Adam Smith [8:13 PM] Wow it just keeps going.[8:13] Dan and Carleen are literally in danger of dying of old age.
Angus Kidman [8:14 PM] Final: $2.3m, profit $525K.
[8:14] May I just say on Jodie's behalf: SUCK IT BOOMERS (she's on holidays folks or she would totally be here with us).
Marc Terrano [8:14 PM] Hahah @adam.smith.[8:14] Great result for the old timers.
Adam Smith [8:14 PM] Yeah, not too bad. And given their age, they don't have to make it last as long as the others.
Adam Smith [8:15 PM] OK Kim and Chris up next. They've got the penthouse, which could help.
Angus Kidman [8:16 PM] True. But $715K is gonna be tough to beat.
Adam Smith [8:16 PM] What's not helping is this Snow Patrol song.
Angus Kidman [8:16 PM] Snow Patrol never helps. Except with insomnia.
Adam Smith [8:16 PM] OK, pay attention to this auctioneer's hand size. My working theory is that small-handed auctioneers are better.
Angus Kidman [8:17 PM] I'm going to make you check that theory across all 12 series tomorrow Adam.
Adam Smith [8:17 PM] I've got to stop theorising about stuff that can actually be researched.
Marc Terrano [8:17 PM] Tough start.
Adam Smith [8:17 PM] Ooooh, first one to come in below reserve.
Marc Terrano [8:17 PM] Only 20K of profit so far.
Marc Terrano [8:18 PM] Stalling $2.1 m.
Adam Smith [8:18 PM] Man this is NOT going well for them so far.[8:18] I mean, relatively speaking.
Marc Terrano [8:18 PM] I thought their apartment was great.
Adam Smith [8:19 PM] I thought their styling left a lot to be desired. Vomiting Pinterest boards onto a room does not equal styling.
Marc Terrano [8:19 PM] Shelly doing her best to sell the apartment to the other contestants?
Adam Smith [8:19 PM] You'd think it would do better just by virtue of being the penthouse.
Angus Kidman [8:19 PM] Surprise bid from the boys!
Adam Smith [8:19 PM] A couple of them did just come into some money.[8:20] No-one at this auction looks like they're having fun.[8:20] They look like they're bidding on a painful rectal exam instead of an apartment.
Angus Kidman [8:21 PM] Ooh, interesting -- telling the bidder she's not trying enough.
Marc Terrano [8:21 PM] This is weird.
Marc Terrano [8:21 PM] and painful (like a rectal exam I guess).
Angus Kidman [8:21 PM] Early prediction: next year's site will be a former colonoscopy clinic.
Marc Terrano [8:21 PM] Haha.
Adam Smith [8:22 PM] Man this auctioneer is going for a weird strategy.
Angus Kidman [8:23 PM] Decision, stress, ad break!
Marc Terrano [8:23 PM] I've met this auctioneer, Damien Cooley
Angus Kidman [8:23 PM] Ah, the fine Mr Cooley
Marc Terrano [8:23 PM] Must be going for a slightly left of field approach
Adam Smith [8:23 PM] Did you happen to notice his hand size?
Angus Kidman [8:23 PM] Here's his video from last year
Angus Kidman [8:28 PM] And we're back, talking about cards and sleeves.
Marc Terrano [8:28 PM] Things are not looking good for Kim and Chris.[8:29] (relatively speaking)
Angus Kidman [8:29 PM] We're not greedy! Wrong show folks.
Adam Smith [8:29 PM] Kim and Chris happy with $2.2m.
Marc Terrano [8:29 PM] Chris is a lovely guy.
Adam Smith [8:29 PM] I mean $320k is nothing to sneeze at.
Angus Kidman [8:30 PM] Well, quite. I take at least two weeks to make that from my modelling career.
Marc Terrano [8:30 PM] Frank is in!
Adam Smith [8:30 PM] The old Cooley bait and switch is working.
Marc Terrano [8:30 PM] $370K profit.
Adam Smith [8:31 PM] Man everyone HATES this auction.[8:31] They all look so sad.
Marc Terrano [8:31 PM] This has been a real grind but they've gotten $400k in profit.
Angus Kidman [8:33 PM] Final: $2.305m, $425K profit[8:33] Pity they didn't beat D&C.
Adam Smith [8:34 PM] so thus far the profit has been inversely proportionate to auction order.[8:34] So Ben and Andy make the lowest profit?[8:34] Their place does have an extra bedroom.
Angus Kidman [8:34 PM] And they have the lowest reserve.
Adam Smith [8:35 PM] Some of the poor styling choices aside, that's got to be worth something.
Angus Kidman [8:35 PM] So even at $2.2m they would get a decent wodge. But $2.4m seems a stretch.
I like their logic: $64K each would be fine.
Adam Smith [8:35 PM] Are they gonna auction the challenge apartment too?
Angus Kidman [8:36 PM] This is where my ignorance of Block History shows and I wish Jodie was here.[8:36] OK, they've earned their first year teaching salary each. Nice.
Adam Smith [8:36 PM] They've got their two teachers' salaries and then some.
Marc Terrano [8:37 PM] $160k in profit so far.
Adam Smith [8:37 PM] Certainly four bedrooms gets them over 2 mil.
Marc Terrano [8:37 PM] It's a hard slog for the boys
Angus Kidman [8:37 PM] "You dog!"
Angus Kidman [8:37 PM] These boys are SO young. Forget that sometimes.
Marc Terrano [8:37 PM] The ties are obviously not working.[8:38] Frank is in with the game changer bid (as per usual).
Adam Smith [8:38 PM] They can hardly contain themselves! Scott might rip his shirt off in excitement!
Angus Kidman [8:39 PM] I love that they're happy with the outcome and don't care about winning.[8:39] My fellow viewers are now 100% for this team.
Adam Smith [8:40 PM] I mean they are likeable.[8:40] Could they beat Kim and Chris?
Angus Kidman [8:40 PM] Only $16K to go to do that.
Marc Terrano [8:41 PM] If it wasn't for the dramatic music this auction would put me to sleep.
Angus Kidman [8:41 PM] But they are ahead of Kim and Chris![8:41] Here's Bonnie again . . . .
Adam Smith [8:41 PM] And another cheeky ad break.
Angus Kidman [8:43 PM] According to the TV guide, this finished at 8:30pm. But we never thought that was likely!
Adam Smith [8:45 PM] According to foxtel, 8:53. that's a very specific and strange time.
Angus Kidman [8:45 PM] And yet much more plausible.
Marc Terrano [8:46 PM] This ad is really creepy.
Angus Kidman [8:46 PM] Ratings fact: the actual result 15 minutes will be coded as a separate show. This will allow Nine in all probability to claim the top 2 shows for the night with The Block.[8:46] More on Block ratings[8:46] And we're back!
Adam Smith [8:47 PM] This 5k increment stuff is getting maddening.
Marc Terrano [8:48 PM] Is this the Batman soundtrack?
Adam Smith [8:48 PM] This was unexpected. Over 500k profit.
Angus Kidman [8:49 PM] Couldn't happen to a nicer pair of idiots.[8:49] Final: $2.25m, $510K profit.
Adam Smith [8:49 PM] Pretty great result.[8:50] Maybe it was the surprise toilet.
Angus Kidman [8:50 PM] Nice. Again, wish they'd beaten the boomers.[8:50] Only $15K short though!
Adam Smith [8:50 PM] Surprised Kim and Chris came last. Maybe they should have been greedy.[8:50] This music. Jeez, they didn't just escape a POW camp. they sold an apartment.
Marc Terrano [8:51 PM] Hahaha my thoughts exactly.
Angus Kidman [8:51 PM] David Bowie does not deserve this to happen to him.
Adam Smith [8:51 PM] So Karlie and Will take out the top prize.
Angus Kidman [8:51 PM] So it's all over and I guess we're pretty happy with that outcome.
Adam Smith [8:52 PM] BUT WHAT HAPPENS TO THE CHALLENGE APARTMENT???
Angus Kidman [8:52 PM] Didn't beat last year's winning total of $755K, I might note.
Marc Terrano [8:52 PM] Plot twist: The challenge apartment was a ghost all along.
Adam Smith [8:52 PM] Does it just fall into disrepair and get inhabited by squatters?[8:52] hahahahaha
Angus Kidman [8:52 PM] Nine sell the challenge apartment to pay Scott's salary.
Marc Terrano [8:53 PM] And we're done!
Angus Kidman [8:53 PM] So what have we learned?
Adam Smith [8:53 PM] The contestants lived through The Block, and so did we.
Angus Kidman [8:53 PM] Being a professional stylist does not help. Being able to estimate your budgets does. It's important to enjoy your life.
Marc Terrano [8:54 PM] The red-hot Melbourne housing market fixes all renovation mistakes.
Angus Kidman [8:54 PM] But only when you invite advocates along.[8:54] Shelley needs a new stylist.[8:54] Scott needs a button supervisor.
Adam Smith [8:54 PM] And, if the prognosticators are right, these apartments will be worth 20% less by next year.
Angus Kidman [8:55 PM] We will be tracking those numbers. Tune in tomorrow folks when we'll have some more coherent final thoughts. Thanks for joining in!
Note: This transcript has been lightly edited for clarity.Back to top