The Block 2017 recap: Two steps forward, eight weeks back

Adam Smith 26 September 2017

The Block Ep 34It’s a blast from the recent past this week on The Block, as the contestants redo the 48-hour challenge rooms from the very first episode.

But first Sticks and Wombat get to revel in their very first win as they enjoy their retreat away from the Block. Now, previous room challenge winners have been whisked away to luxurious mansions in the middle of wine country, whereas the boys get shoved in a stock-standard Richmond terrace house where Wombat has to sleep on the floor in a sleeping bag. We’re left to wonder why our loveable larrikins don’t get the same five-star treatment.

Then, the two proceed to fill the house with farts and flapjack crumbs and we wonder no more.

Screen Shot 2017-09-25 at 2.22.41 pm

*BRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!*

Back at the Block, mercifully far away from the commingling aroma of stale flatulence and pancake batter, it’s time for open for inspections.

First up is last week’s last place team, Hannah and Clint. Ronnie echoes the judges’ feedback by saying the couple’s hallway reminds him of his childhood dormitory. Well, no one is pantsing you or shoving you into a locker, Ronnie, so it can’t be that reminiscent.

Ronnie and Georgia’s house is next, and the two are in the unfamiliar position of second-to-last. Once again, the judges are vindicated as Sarah immediately notices the mismatched Victorian arch. The couple’s laundry draws plenty of praise, however.

Next are Jason and Sarah, and the other contestants are just as wowed by the hallway’s skylights and trusses as the judges were. Hannah marvels, asking how Jason and Sarah managed to finish such a huge room. That’s an easy one, Hannah. They didn’t.

High ceilings continue to wow our contestants as they move on to Josh and Elyse’s. While the couple’s dramatic hallway gets a big tick from all the other teams, Ronnie and Georgia are less impressed by the lack of storage in Josh and Elyse’s laundry. Georgia says if the couple had a family, they’d understand the need for storage. If they had a family, Georgia? Do you think they hatched from an alien pod or something?

Finally, Sticks and Wombat’s winning hallway is up for inspection. Everyone seems suitably impressed by the duo’s effort, and they’re particularly blown away by the hallway’s automatic attic ladder, which in addition to being a neat feature is also a pretty great tongue twister.

With inspections out of the way, it’s off to work on this week’s bedrooms. Because the initial 48-hour challenge determined the order in which contestants got to choose their houses, there’s been a bit of shuffling since that first episode. While Sticks and Wombat and Jason and Sarah still have their original challenge houses, Ronnie and Georgia took Josh and Elyse’s, Josh and Elyse took Clint and Hannah’s, Clint and Hannah took Ronnie and Georgia’s, What’s on second and I Don’t Know is on third.

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As the old saying goes, “one man’s trash is another man’s treasure”. Unfortunately, Josh and Elyse learn that the reverse is also true. It turns out that Hannah and Clint plastered over roughly a landfill worth of debris in their ceiling.

Everyone is fighting through demolitions for their challenge rooms, except Jason and Sarah. The couple actually already tackled their challenge room all the way back in week two. You may remember it as the room Sarah wanted to cover in horrifying insects. This means they’ll have to start from scratch with a previously untouched guest room.

Of course, the two spring into action by milling about and leaning on things. By the end of day one, they’ve accomplished precisely nothing.

The pair’s lack of progress does not go unnoticed by Foreman Keith, who figures, “What the hell? I’ll roll that boulder up the hill one more time”. He takes Jason to task, accusing him of using The Block as a holiday. Jason and Sarah quite rightly point out that this would be the world’s worst holiday, but things escalate and Jason and Keith nearly come to blows.

Screen Shot 2017-09-25 at 2.24.58 pm Commence Jason blow-up #347

Later, the two smooth things over and Jason apologises for his outburst. You mean Jason lost his cool and had to apologise for his actions? This show certainly likes to keep things fresh.

Speaking of recurring themes, it looks like Ronnie’s gamesmanship is going to come back to bite him in the very near future. In addition to taking on their guest rooms, the contestants are also in the planning phase for their backyards. Ronnie has to crane in his swimming pool. His initial plan was to park the crane on an adjacent neighbour’s tennis court, but said neighbour apparently took two seconds to Google the effect 100-tonne, treaded vehicles have on tennis courts and has put the kibosh on the idea.

Now, Ronnie has to go hat in hand to Sticks and Wombat and Josh and Elyse to see if he can crane the pool over their properties. Thank goodness he’s built up so much goodwill.

Missed an episode? You can read our recaps of every episode of The Block 2017 here.

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