A round-up of what we're loving this week... and what we're hating.
He appeared on Zach Galifianakis’ show ‘Between Two Ferns’ and when asked if it “kind of stinks” that he couldn’t run for president three times, Obama replied, “Actually I think it’s a good idea. If I ran a third time it would be sort of like doing a third Hangover movie. It didn’t really work out very well, did it.”
He’s not a regular president. He’s a cool president.
Proof that Lorde is fearless and does not suffer fools, she had the perfect response when
professional dick radio shock jock Kyle Sandilands asked if she was in a lesbian relationship with Taylor Swift, because female friendship always leads to lesbians. “Don’t even try it. Not working,” she said, after questioning whether Kyle had a problem with lesbians in general.
In other news, Kyle and Jackie O’s radio show has reached top ratings which means SYDNEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING. YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF.
Short Term Memory Loss
At a deposition hearing in the US, Justin Bieber was asked if he had ever been to Australia. He replied “I don’t know if I’ve ever been to Australia.” He then turned to a member of his entourage and asked, “Have I been to Australia?”
Yes, Biebs, you did. Six months ago. But that’s okay, we’re trying to forget about it, too.
Happy Facebook Posts
A study looking at emotional contagion on social media found that while both positive and negative status updates on Facebook were contagious (aka your social network’s mood is affected by your mood), happy posts were the ones that spread further. A negative post led to an extra 1.29 negative posts than normal amongst a person’s online friends, while a positive post encouraged an extra 1.75 posts.
Mrs Sippy, Double Bay
The very possible future Mrs Prince Harry, Cressida Bonas, spent six months serving pizza here during her gap year in 2012… before she was told she couldn’t balance plates properly and was sent behind the bar. If there’s a royal wedding, would the staff be invited?
He has the world’s most awkward-looking muscles and can’t do anything with them. Bro do you even lift? Nah, just inject mineral oil and alcohol into your arms, instead.
The five people in hospital after they ate this burger
It’s supposedly the ‘worlds hottest burger’, measuring 9.2 million on the Scoville ‘hotness’ scale (by comparison, a chilli measures 500). One guy went to hospital with a perforated bowel, while four others were treated for anaphylactic shock. Others have stripped naked after eating the burger, begged for mercy, punched windows and vomited. Maybe it’s time to, you know, not eat the burger.
He can’t be having a fun day. Or week. It’s not everyone who can cause inconvenience to thousands of people AND delay an expensive project for months. You might have missed the fire on Wednesday, but you probably didn’t miss people whining about the traffic. #barangarooproblems
You know that hot chick on your Facebook feed? You should go and steal all of her photos and post it into Reddit’s subreddit /R/FacebookCleavage, which is dedicated to sexy pictures of hot Facebook friends. Charming randoms on the internet can then make suggestions like “I would hate f*$k her for the worst 2.5 minutes of her life.” Reddit will allow it, because they seem to have confused “free speech” with “acting like a decent f*&king human being”. Oh, the internet.
The Information Mine
On the good side of Reddit, Tim Berners-Lee, inventor of the world wide web, revealed in an AMA that The Information Mine (TIM) was one of its alternative names. Luckily he didn’t go with it, because a) naming it after yourself would have been a bit pretentious and b), you’d feel slightly judged every time you went on The Information Mine to look at cat videos.